Cartoons that existed: James Bond Jr.

Yes folks, the early 90s gave us this short-lived gem of a show featuring the exploits and shenanigans of 007's nephew, who bore the suffix "Jr." for some reason. He introduced himself to people like his uncle: Bond. James Bond. Junior and even had his own Q, in the form of I.Q., the grandson of Bond's own Q. He also had muscle in the form of Felix Leiter's son, Gordon (nicknamed Gordo).

He might not be licensed to kill,
but he'll destroy your ladyparts.

The premise of the show had the younger Bond attending a academy (as rich Brits do, apparently) with his friends, while sneaking out to fight bad guys from an off-shoot of SPECTRE called SCUM - Saboteurs and Criminals United in Mayhem. The show featured a few of Uncle Bond's adversaries, such as Jaws, Oddjob, and Dr. No, who for some reason, has a Fu Manchu and green skin. Oh, and he's alive. And has cybernetic arms. He looks more like The Mandarin did from the 90s Iron Man cartoon, to tell you the truth.

"We have you now Iron Man--I mean Mr. Bond. Junior.

The show didn't last long, running from September 1991 to March the following year, yet the show managed to accumilate 65 episodes, a comic, and toys. I had a James Bond Jr. action figure and it was pretty meh. Articulation was limited to the shoulders, hips, and I think the neck.

Pictures via Chud, jenkarr, and Wikipedia.

Go ninja! Go ninja! GO! Vanilla Ice's Ninja Rap

Oh yes, it existed. Back in the early 90s, Vanilla Ice created a song for Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles II: The Secret of the Ooze and it was the greatest rap song ever. EVER. If anyone ever tells you otherwise, feel free to punch their in their stupid mouths.

Fun fact: In TMNT 2, Super Shredder was played by professional wrestler Kevin Nash.

The following people can go f*ck themselves

Click to embiggen and rage.

Saw this on Yellow Peril. Japan Probe collected screencaps of various tweets from incredibly ignorant morons in response to the U.S. Women's Soccer Team defeating Japan's team for a gold medal. Unfortunately, this is nothing new. When Japan was devastated by the earthquake, tsunami, and nuclear disasters, idiots made similar comments.

I can only imagine survivors of Pearl Harbor seeing these tweets and facepalming. This is nothing but disgraceful and wholly disgusting racism.

Check out the cover to the FF reboot and how the Fantastic Four reboot is basically Doctor Who now

First up, the cover for the new FF series, which I dig.

Like the art? It's by Mike Allred, famous for creating and drawing Madman and the X-Statix. I really like his art style, it's a huge throwback to the comic artwork of the Silver and Bronze Ages. For the non-comic book geeks, here's a brief rundown of things:

• The characters on the cover are Ant-Man II (Scott Lang), She-Hulk, Medusa, and a brand new character called Miss Thing. Yeah.
• FF is a different, but related title to Fantastic Four. Basically, Reed Richards (Mister Fantastic) grows tired of geniuses everywhere resting on their laurels and founds a new group called Future Foundation with the aim of mentoring the next generation of super-geniuses - be they human, mutant, or something else - and making actual contributions and benefits to the world. FF was created after a storyline in Fantastic Four that ended with the "death" of Johnny Storm, the Human Torch. Obviously, he got better and the team was reformed.

The premise of the reboot is tied directly to the Fantastic Four's own reboot:

The story line to kick off both of his new books, which share a definite road map, is actually inspired by, of all people, Gov. Angus King of Maine. When he left office in 2003, he, his wife and his two kids hopped in a 40-foot RV and for six months, saw America by driving 15,000 miles over 34 states.

"It was this intensive road-trip home-school experience," Fraction says. "I don't really know any parent who wouldn't want to do that with the time and money available."

The story stuck with Fraction, and it became the root of his idea for the Richards clan: Reed builds a ship that will take his team and his children across time and space for an epic historical lesson, the writer says. "If they're studying ancient Rome, then by God let's go have lunch with Caesar on the Ides of March. If they're looking at the Big Bang, they're going to watch it from the front row."

While the trip will take a year for the Fantastic Four and family, only four minutes will pass for everyone else. Still, Reed decides to put together a backup team to hold the fort for those four minutes. Each member of this team is chosen by each member of the Four. Additionally, Ant-Man is chosen to head the Future Foundation.

Is it just me, or does the new Fantastic Four sound sort of like Doctor Who? During the early years of the show, it had a more historical bent, with the Doctor and his companions traveling to different periods in time. This was before Daleks, Cybermen, and such. I hope Fraction or Allred is a Whovian and sneaks the TARDIS in somewhere.

Yes, but can Dark Knight Returns Batman do the Batusi?

Look on the bright side, Robin,
at least it isn't the All Star Batman.

I've seen this picture by Marco D'alfonso floating through Tumblr and had to post it. He's done a few other pictures too, including one featuring my favorite Decepticon and Deadpool!

After a night of fighting crime, there's nothing like a cup of tea, chum

Click to embiggen.

Remember when Batman used to say "chum"? I miss that. Remember when he wasn't an ultra-paranoid asshole? I miss that too.

(via dean trippe)

Okay, now this just ridiculous - a fridge with a Twitter app

Someone on reddit posted this picture of a refrigerator they saw while out shopping. Look at the icons at the bottom of that screen. It has apps for Twitter, AP News, Pandora, etc. Now, I'm not complaining about this thing having a touch screen or a memo app, because A. It's the 21st century and we're bound to have touch screens everywhere. and B. A memo app would be pretty useful if you can't find a pen and paper and need to leave a note or a reminder. Pandora gets a pass too because, hey, a lot of people have a radio in their kitchen and this simplifies things, but what is the point of a Twitter app? What could you possibly tweet about at a fridge? "Getting some ice. #ilovefrozenh2o"? The AP News app just seems pointless because I can't see someone standing at their fridge, hunched over and reading the news. Epicurious also gets a pass because I just figured out what it is.

I just dread the day someone has the idea to put a touch screen and a Twitter app on a toilet. Worse: It automatically tweets every time you use the toilet. Every.time. "Just took a shit. Man, I need to lay off the Mongolian BBQ. #epicpoops"

Like Harrison Ford, I'm getting frantic

Barenaked Ladies - One Week.

Is there a Doctor in Asgard? Christopher Eccleston cast in Thor: The Dark World!

So sayeth Deadline. I read reports this morning on Tumblr that he was in talks, but I didn't want to post about something that might not happen. That's a lie, I didn't post it because I wanted to post the DW season 7 trailer. Also, laziness. Yeah. Hmm.

Anyway, Eccleston, who (for the non-Whovians) played the ninth incarnation of the Doctor will be playing the villain in Thor: The Dark World, Malekith the Accursed. I have no idea who that is. Admittedly, I haven't been a big reader of the Thor comics, but according to Wikipedia, he's a dark elf and ruler of Svartalfheim, home of the dark elves and debuted in 1984.

Excellent. Most excellent.

Pictures via Sci Fi Scoop and  Super Powered Fiction.

Watch Batman sing "Am I Blue?" while your arguments are invalidated

From the season one* episode of Justice League Unlimited "This Little Piggy".



In the episode, a woman named Circe magically transforms Wonder Woman into a pig and she only agrees to change her back if Batman sings. Great Bat-moment or greatest Bat-moment? The writers really cockteased fans with a possible Batman/Wonder Woman relationship, but despite it being obvious that they were into each other, it never came to be. I'm assuming DC was responsible for that. Bastards.

*Really, it was season three, since JLU was just a continuation of the Justice League cartoon with an expanded roster of characters.